Worries Never Cease

Being a parent I find I worry about everything. From sleeping habits to speech, from playing or roughhousing to dietary preferences. It is never ending. Think about it – if Nicholas keeps getting up in the middle of the night I worry about why he is not sleeping through the night. And when he does sleep through the night I worry if he is sick and just wants to sleep and sleep and sleep.

If he eats everything on his plate I worry if he is eating too much but if he doesn’t eat everything I worry if he is eating enough. And so it is with going to preschool or day care or whatever fancy word there is. I worry if keeping them home would negatively impact their development but at the same time worry if they are ready to go out to school.

Speaking of preschool, I worry about Nicholas having separation anxiety when we decide to put him into preschool but I will worry if he doesn’t shed at least one tear over it.

I worry about temper tantrums and at the same time worry about….. well temper tantrums!

I worry about what career path Angeline will choose and then worry when she tells me. Why? Because I have my own preconceived notions about what she should choose.

I will worry when Angeline, Jodi and Nicholas start dating but will worry if at an appropriate age they are not (well not so much for Angeline and Jodi - they can start dating when they are like forty - five or so).

I used worry about Jodi not saying Mommy for a long time. Now I worry if she doesn’t say Daddy when I walk through the door.

I used to worry about the kids not yet talking and someday I worry that they will never stop. (Aw come on you know what I mean!)

I worry that the list above is not a complete list and thus worry that I will have lot more to worry about as they grow up.

Quite frankly I worry about the fact that I worry so much.

Sleep Interrupted

Milk? Milk Please?

That was Nicholas requesting a cup of milk, so I got up and trudged downstairs, opened the refrigerator poured his milk and took it back upstairs. On my way back up my eyes wandered over the clock on the microwave.

3:05.

AM.

At that moment, one of my favorite expressions flashed across my mind.

You have got to be kidding me!

That was the thought but really this is the norm. Welcome to parenthood.

It is not unusual for me to have this late night interruption. After all Nicholas does love to stroll over at some point during the night to our bed. Or maybe the interruption is Jodi crying in her sleep. Sometimes I hear a phantom cry. Other times I wake up expecting to hear a cry which doesn't happen. But it doenst matter. I am up anyway. One thing is for sure: my sleep from this point on has been interrupted.

Permanently.

If you have told me twelve years ago that I would be yearning for uninterrupted sleep, I would have laughed. After all, I pioneered the concept of “sleep days”. Here is how Sleep Days work: it was one day a week where I would go to sleep the moment I got home. This was back from my college days when I worked and went to school at nights. So one day each week I would not work late, no homework or studying. Just sleep.

But those days are over. The brutal truth is that once you are a parent a good night’s sleep is one of those little things that you are eternally grateful for when it happens. Because the moment you take that little bundle of joy home, your sleep just got interrupted. On a permanent basis.

At this rate I may end up being the one crying!